Quiet Winter

Rikki watched on from the balcony as snow somberly drifted down from above, blanketing Burrowgatory in pure white. The landscape beneath him shimmered, semi-illuminated by the glow of the streetlamps. Snowflakes dusted his eyelashes and the crisp winter air filled his lungs, his breath becoming visible with every exhale.

It was a quiet night, not a soul was stirring. Most buns were already tucked comfortably into their beds, their thoughts being occupied only by their dreams. Rikki's thoughts however were currently keeping him awake.

Something had been on his mind for a while now and it was bothering him, but he couldn't put it into words. It felt as if there was a big knot inside of him that he couldn't untangle. It wasn't like standing here in the cold could fix him, but somehow as he stared out at the endless snowy void before him it all felt so... distant. He felt that maybe if he were to lie down and let himself be buried by the snow these feelings of confliction would be buried as well.

These kinds of feelings weren't like him at all. He didn't understand them or why he was having them. He just wanted to go back to the carefree bun that he'd always been, but he didn’t know how. A deep sigh escaped his lips.

In his concentration he'd failed to notice the muffled crunching of snow beneath slippers coming up behind him. Suddenly he felt the warm sensation of a hand on his shoulder. The unexpected touch startled him so badly that he nearly fell off the balcony.

“Ah!” The unknown bun let out a squeak of alarm and pulled Rikki away from the edge and into their arms. Having just seen his life flash before his eyes, Rikki gasped for air. Looking up, his innocent icy blue-grey eyes met with a familiar passionate pink. It was then that comprehension dawned and Rikki understood the knot inside of him.

“I'm sorry to have startled you, but you have to be more careful Rikkun! I couldn't bear it if you were hurt...” The bun who'd startled him and was now reprimanding him was none other than Lavish, his husband.

“Oh, you're so cold dear!” As he said this, Lavi proceeded to envelop Rikki within the warmth of his robe, bringing the two intimately close together.

“What are you doing out here in only your pajamas?”

“...” Rikki looked away, suddenly feeling guilty. His faced flushed and he wanted to cry.

“I wanted.. to surprise you. I caught a snowflake for you.” His fingers trembling, Rikki gently held out his palm to reveal... nothing.

“Ahh~ You're so silly sometimes.” Lavi leaned in and placed a peck on Rikki's lips before beginning to turn and herd him towards the door.

“Let's get you inside before you get sick, dear. I'll help you get all warmed up” Rikki nodded and went along silently, looking back at the falling snow just one last time.

I'm sorry Lavi...

It was a lie. A white lie as pure as the snow itself. To protect the feelings of the one dearest to him. He couldn't bring himself to tell him the truth.

I'm so sorry.

How could he possibly tell him that he'd been using him this whole time?