Manners Strictly Mandatory

Aside from Paradise Café, Taffy never cared much for visiting the Heavenly Embassy. The way she dressed seemed to garner a lot of attention from cherubuns that frequented there. She was used to people ogling her in the rest of Burrowgatory, even enjoyed it as long as there's no explicit comments, but the attention she would get at the Heavenly Embassy was… different. Judgemental glares from cherubuns struggling to let go of puritanical habits, concerned looks as some cherubuns whisper to each other, and sometimes lines of overeager and poorly-worded questioning from cherubuns fascinated by succubun culture. It was all very difficult to ignore.

However, today Taffy had to swallow her discomfort, as she had planned a meet-up with some cherubun friends she made at Paradise Café. Despite her still getting the same treatment from the clientele, she had a good time with her friends. She even got to them about how she had a tea party with Dove and how laid-back it was, tossing aside the need for perfect table manners in favor of authentically getting to know each other. They chatted for a long while, strolling about the Embassy, before the others had to go.

As Taffy was waving goodbye to her friends, she heard someone loudly clearing their throat behind her. When she turned around, she saw Primrose with a dark expression contrasting his angelically light clothing.

“Um…” Taffy started, feeling a chill in the air. “Can I help you?”

“Yes,” Primrose responded curtly. “You can.”

“Ooookay…” Taffy looked around to try to get a hint about what was going on, but any other buns around seemed to be dead-set on avoiding looking her way for once.

Primrose approached menacingly. “I could not help but overhear your conversation earlier. The one regarding your visit with Dove. Along with your opinion on manners.”

“Ah.” Taffy was starting to piece together what was happening. Not that it made her feel especially better.

“I’m not particularly surprised by it. Dove is obviously no stranger to casting away and downplaying the importance of Melangel’s teachings. And, well…” Primrose placed a hand on the cross decorating his neck as he eyed Taffy up and down. “...You don't seem to have much interest in such matters yourself.”

“Uh-huuuh…” This was really hampering Taffy’s usual cheerful attitude.

“As I was saying, though I’m not shocked that you and Dove feel that way, I find it extremely alarming that you’re spreading such rhetoric within the Heavenly Embassy. This is the only place one can find any sensible and polite company, and I cannot have you poisoning it. I am strongly considering banning you from the premises.”

Taffy huffed. “I think you’re overreacting a little. Dove and I just let ourselves relax while we had a tea party. I even tried to have perfect etiquette at first, but I nearly passed out from holding my breath. We weren’t dismissing manners wholesale.”

Primrose furrowed his brow in pure incredulity. “You were holding your breath? Why? What?” Before Taffy could respond, he held out his hand to stop her. “Nevermind that. It's clear that the issue here stems from ignorance. If you agree to receive lessons in the importance of etiquette, I will mercifully forgive your transgressions.”

As much as Taffy disliked the Embassy and this high-and-mighty asshole, she didn't want to give up hanging out with her friends where they were most comfortable. Not to mention being banned from the Embassy would mean being banned from Paradise Café…

“Fine. I’ll take the lessons. Where are they held?”

Primrose smiled sardonically as if he had won an argument. So much for benevolence. “I hold them regularly nearby. I also hold them on request, and you seem to be in a position where it would behoove you to request one. Shall we go?”

Pushy for a guy who was supposed to be an authority on manners. He was correct that Taffy had little other choice here, so she gave a reluctant nod before the two set off to the lesson hall.

The moment they were both in the building, Primrose whipped around and held up a finger.

“First lesson! Dressing properly.” He made his way over to a closet in the hallway, not letting Taffy's “Oh, come ON” stop him. He quickly plucked a long coat off of the rack and held it towards the other bun. “Wearing revealing clothing is bad manners. Please change.”

“I'm not doing that.”

Primrose tensed up and furrowed his eyebrows. “And why not? Give me one good reason why I shouldn't terminate these lessons and send you back down immediately!”

Taffy looked down at herself and smiled. “I like my outfit! It makes me happy! I can't imagine myself being comfortable in clothes that don't let my skin breathe.” She looked back up at Primrose, still maintaining her smile. “Besides, wouldn't you prefer a polite guest in an outfit you disagree with than a rude guest dressed the same way? If you turn away people for what they choose to wear, no one's manners are ever gonna get any better!”

Silence wafted between the two of them before Primrose slowly put the coat back in the closet, straining like it was made out of lead. “...As long as you intend to follow the rest of the lessons.”

The succubun gave a nod. “If they're reasonable, sure!”

“Oh, they are. It is always reasonable to conduct yourself correctly. Follow me, please.”

The two buns walked down the hallway and into a large empty room that seemed to be all set up for a banquet.

Taffy looked around, marveling at the beautiful decorations. “Wowww… Is this for an event?”

Primrose produced a handkerchief from his pocket and rubbed a tiny smudge from one of the plates as he spoke. “Of sorts. I will be holding a dinner party here in a few days. More and more decent-ish cherubuns have been partaking in hedonistic parties in Burrowgatory, and so I decided to offer an alternative.”

Ah. Of course. “I think it's good that they're trying new things!” Taffy chirped, folding her hands in front of her.

“And I think you should sit down so we can continue your lessons.” Primrose pulled out a chair and gracefully waved Taffy to it with the most unwelcoming expression possible.

Hands falling back to her sides, Taffy huffed and sat down. Trying to recall the usual idea of how a polite person would sit, she placed her hands in her lap and sat up straight.

Primrose hummed, at first approvingly, then sinking into a disgruntled noise. “Better than I had expected, but not quite right. Your legs are too far apart.”

Taffy looked down at her lap. Her legs were not spread in any sense of the word. They were pointed forward, and her upper thighs were together. She looked up at Primrose, puzzled.

The cherubun sighed. “Your legs should be close enough together to keep a little marble between your knees.”

“Huh. And the purpose is…?”

“Why, for modesty, of course! Keeping your legs open invites unsavory thoughts!”

Taffy laughed. “That’s such a weird jump! Do slightly spread legs make you think of sex? Be honest, it’s okay.”

Primrose turned beet red in the face as he raised up his hands defensively. “A-absolutely not! I meant from th-those that are less pure!” Dramatically, he turned and looked away. “Even if I did find myself with thoughts like that… it would be a necessity for me to dispel them immediately.”

…Yeah, that was baggage that Taffy didn’t wanna pry into any further. “So, uh, I see multiple forks here, they’re used for different things, right?”

From there, Primrose was able to teach Taffy the ins and outs of silverware etiquette at least somewhat amicably, aside from a bit of friction when Taffy half-joked that the only spoon she cared about was the dessert spoon. It took much longer than Taffy had expected for Primrose to be satisfied with the lesson, but the time did eventually come.

“Alright, that’s enough. I think you are beginning to understand the importance of proper manners. Very good.”

“Does that mean that I’m fine to come back to the Embassy?”

“Yes. For now, at least. I may assign you more lessons in the future, however, depending on your behavior henceforth.”

“...Great. Well, I guess I’ll see you around!”

With that, Taffy waved goodbye to Primrose and set off on her way back home, trying to rub a headache off her forehead.