[Gift] Life of the Party

“A wonderful evening to all the attendees currently present at the Casino — and the Rabbit Hole, too. Me and the shop owners ‘round here have been turnin’ beautiful numbers, thanks to the patronage of all you lovely li’l bunnies. As they say, your sin is our business, and what better way to celebrate than to have a li’l house party? Bottomless drinks and endless snacks from the Rabbit Hole on us, but if you wanna play, you better pay. Who am I to tell you what to do, though? That’s enough announcin’ for me tonight. Angora, speakin’ on behalf of your—ahem—so duuutifully humble Burrowgatory shop crew, wishes you a wonderful Burrowgatory Bash.”

The intercom above peters out; the regular crackle and announcement jingle one would hear after a lengthy announcement like that was instead drowned out by the cheers of hundreds of buns—pondering around in both bun and doll form—in a variable vocal cacophony of ‘just getting started’ to ‘totally dead-beat drunk already’. With a thinly pulled pout, Levi blew bubbles into his gin and tonic. Come to the Bash with us, they said. It’ll be fun, they said. I promise I won’t get dead drunk and pass out on the bar counter at the beginning of the night, they said. Levi sighed, patting his passed out friend’s shoulder as they slumped over the Rabbit Hole’s bar after downing fifteen vodka jello shots in a row and then promising that they “didn’t feel a thing” before… Well, y’know.

“Er, uh, hey — is your friend…”
“Yeah.” Levi only half-turned towards the stranger who approached.
“Oh man, what a party animal. Y’know, I could take them off your hands for ya…”
Levi squinted. “… you’ll take ‘em home?”
“Oh. Oh yeah, home.” The way the stranger bun bit their lip had Levi scratching his head, but… better that than nothing, right? Levi leaned over and pinched his friend’s nose until they sputtered awake.

“BwuH?!”
The friend looked to Levi, but all Levi did was point to the stranger.
“Oh… ohhhhh… jus-my type? Levi you geniussshhh…”
“Yeah yeah, go have fun. Just find me whenever you’re done.”
“Okeeyyyyyy…”

And with that, Levi’s friend has officially left to go take care of… “business”, and Levi was now a solo partier. It wasn’t that bad to sit by the bar all on his lonesome—free drinks and snacks were the BEST—but if he stayed dawdling around in one place for too long he'd get jumpscared by people trying to pick him up. And well… he might as well take a look around to see what people are doing if he’s here… right? Better than a jumpscare.

After washing down the last bit of his gin, Levi slid the glass along the counter and pushed off. Time to wander aimlessly.

…

“Oh, oops — sorry, love.”
“Uh, it’s fine…”

Drying his hands on his scapular as he hustled past, Levi watched the titular head priest of the Church of Sulfur awkwardly shuffle out to the Casino floor. While moving between the bar and casino areas, Levi had bumped into Oleander as the priest was hurrying out of the bathroom. Whatever could he have been doing in there? Who knows. But… well, the two were heading in the same direction, and there was an odd hop in Oleander’s step that got Levi wondering… might as well start following people around to see what’s happening at the Bash, right? So as Oleander slid his way through the crowded casino floor, Levi casually meandered along…

“Mercy! You saved me a seat, dear.” With an endearing little smile, the head nun slid themselves into this specific blackjack table’s third base seat as Oleander took up his seat right beside them. Keeping the head priest’s seat warm, huh. With nothing else to do, Levi took up one of the seats closer to first base and tapped down his bet. He wasn’t the gambling type, but he’d be damned if he couldn’t at least win ONE hand.
“Of course I saved you a seat. You told me we’d be able to spend some time together doing something exciting, but after a couple of games you had to hurry along to the toilet…”
“Erm, ahaha. Well, perhaps the excitement was a bit… much.” Oleander tugged at his collar as the dealer started dealing hands. It wasn’t that hot in here, was it? Levi looked at the ceiling a tad confused, but then looked back to the table.
“Alright, alright — we’re here to have fun, Ollie, so no need to worry about it too much.” There was a slight bit of movement under the table as Mercy nudged Oleander’s foot with their heel. He chirped ever so slightly before being nudged again, almost like Mercy was telling him to actually look at his hand.

Levi looked down at his own. A nine and two, and the dealer had a six. Across the table, “Ollie” had an eight and three, and Mercy had a pair of aces. Damn, what a hand. The table was going quick, but as Levi looked up from Mercy’s hand… their eyes met.

They smiled. Levi blinked.

After continuously nudging Oleander’s foot to get the priest to consider his choices, Mercy had simply leaned their arms on the table and propped their face up with their hands. And as they stared right at Levi… they flashed a little peace sign.

Wait, it was Levi’s turn. Was that a peace sign, or something else? Uhh. In a moment of pure empty-mindedness, Levi slapped down an equal bet next to what was already on the table and held out a finger. Double down. The dealer raised an eyebrow, but dealt him a sideways seven and moved to the next player. Eighteen. Not the best… gah why did he DO that?! Well it wasn’t exactly BAD, but… he just wanted one clean game, what was he THINKING?

Funnily enough though, after Oleander looked up from considering his choices—and considering more things, probably—his eyes subtly darted from Levi, to Mercy, to his cards once more. He doubled down too; the motion was infinitesimally more elegant than the panicked action that Levi took… quite impressive, seeing as just earlier he was squinting at the cards as one squints at tiny fonts on official paperwork. The dealer smiled schemingly as Oleander was dealt a sideways six. They say that the casino always has an upper hand on the players, and two have already doubled down. Maybe… was this a lost hand?

However, at third base, Mercy just smiled, placed a second bet, and held out two fingers. Split. The dealer separated their cards and dealt out two more sideways cards — a queen and a nine. One instantly winning blackjack. Oleander made a surprised sound of approval as the dealer dealt Mercy’s winnings, but they didn’t seem all that moved. Was this trained? Or did the dealer still have something up their sleeve?

Well… at least the dealer’s poker face was completely cool until it was time for their reveal. The six… then a seven, then… a ten?! You could tell this guy was a new hire as his ears extended sideways—almost to a ninety degree angle—as he realized that he busted and that all the other players at the table hadn’t. Two double downs, a blackjack, and a full table… you could see their eyes spinning as they started sliding winnings out.

“Oh… OH! I’ve finally won one! Mercy, Mercy! Look! I’ve won! Finally! The blessings of the demons be upon me!” Oleander all but hugged Mercy as he oscillated in his chair at the notion of winning one hand of blackjack. It seems that our good priest had been on a losing spree up until now… who would’ve known.
“Yep, yep. Congratulations Oleander — looks like you’re a winner. Wanna go again?”
“Absolutely!” Oh no… even an airhead like Levi could tell that Oleander may be getting in over his head.
“Yes, Ollie! Let’s have more fun, as much as we can!” Well… not that Mercy minded, at least… even if they were getting lolled about like a ragdoll.

But alas… Levi said he’d play only one hand, and the earnings he got from his double down were plenty. As he tapped out and scooped up his earnings, he couldn’t help but notice a stray card flutter out of Mercy’s sleeve… it fluttered away under a table before anyone else noticed, but again Mercy caught Levi’s eye.

They winked.

And honestly? It wasn’t Levi’s place to intervene. He shuffled off into the greater part of the casino, scratching his head. Man, parties were… something, huh.

…

After stumbling through the main casino floor—playing a couple card games there, a slot machine here, anything that seemed fun enough for someone with a lot of time to kill—Levi managed to stumble into the more secluded casino booths… the ones for VIPs and the like. Wait… how’d he get HERE of all places? His friend nor that stranger were bougie enough to rent a private booth out, and he’d better stick in areas where his friend could easily find him after they were done. Levi had turned on his heel and was about to head out to the greater casino floor when…

“Hey! Hey you! You, yes you! Blue horns, dark hair!”
“M-me?!” An arm was subsequently looped around Levi’s own as a body fell into his side. Hops, the very recognizable bartender for the Rabbit Hole, looked up at Levi with a hopeful sparkle in her eye.
“Aaah, sorry — no wait, you! You look like a lonely guy with no one to play with!”
“Er — I mean…” Not wrong, but still…
“So so, you see — well um, actually! One of our players just passed out drunk and we have an empty seat in our booth, so Lady Angora is wondering if you’d… like to play a couple rounds?!?!” Hops motioned to the booth where Angora and a couple other patrons lay in wait as she all but dragged Levi along. Levi looked at Angora… and she winked. Oh. This was one of those “come and play now” situations rather than it being a choice. This was fine. Going with the flow was probably the best idea at this point. 

“D’aww, thank you so much for grabbin’ us some new players, Hops. What can I call ya, sweetie?” Angora had been in the middle of shuffling a deck of cards, but looked up to address Levi personally.
“Levi… ma’am.”
“Well, pleased to have ya Levi! Stick around and play for as long as ya feel like, alright hon?” Seems like the Queen of the Casino was in a good mood today if she was pulling random passersby into her bar games. As she fanned out the entire deck in a circle—surrounding an empty tall glass and shot glass—Hops took her seat by Angora’s side, looking expectantly at the glasses. Looks like Hops was being allowed to play too… that made for a crowd of about six players.

“For all the new arrivals, we’re gonna be playin’ a game called Seven Princes. Me and Hops thought this one up just for tonight, so don’t get mad if things get a li’l funny, ‘kay?” Angora looked around at the generally nodding players. “Wonderful. So here’s the game: we’ll all take turns drawing cards from this deck—no bein’ choosey, pick the first one ya touch—and if you get a king or an ace, somethin’ special happens.”
“Yup!” Hops chimed in, almost like this was practiced beforehand. She plucked a little notepad from betwixt her cleavage, flipped through a couple pages, and started reading. “We’re going to be making a bomb shot together! If you draw a king or an ace, you get to choose the next ingredient like so: first picks the shot’s liquor, second and third pick mixers for the shot, fourth picks the main liquor, fifth and sixth pick mixers for it, and seventh is the one who who drops the shot and chugs the drink! Since I’m playing too, I’ve already got a whole bunch of drinks and mixers to the side and I’ll make the drink as we go! And when that drink’s gone, we shuffle the deck and play another round!”
“Ohh, good girl! You explained that so well!” Angora didn’t have to lean far to squish Hops’ cheeks and jiggle her around, to the embarrassment of the recipient.
“Ehehe…”
“In any case, now that we all know the rules of the game… shall we get started?”

After hearing that explanation, it looked like the other players involved were raring to go… admittedly, Levi was interested to see what sort of drinks this game would produce as well. Angora started this round by drawing a six of hearts, and then Hops drew a two of spades, and it continued on like that.

“A… king! First king! Amaretto!” One of the patrons left of Levi called out, and with an affirmative nod, Hops got pouring.

“Ace… uh, lime juice?” A splash of lime, for flavor.

When Levi pulled his card… oh, the king of spades. “King. Uh…” Oh dear demons, what did you mix into alcohol again? “Um… cranberry juice.”
“Oooh, good choice — our shot’s a pretty red color!” Hops noted as she poured the final shot and set it off to the side while the game continued in the background.

“Oh, looks like I got one.” Angora chuckled. “Well Hops, let it be… my fourth favorite.”
“Top shelf coconut rum?”
“Perfect, baby. You’re doing so well!” She reached over and pinched Hops’ side this time, causing Hops to go completely red and spill a good amount of rum over the side of the table.
“Oh no, not again…”
“Aha, oopsie. Well… no crying over spilt rum.” With a snap of her fingers, Angora had called over another attendant with a couple rags — the game continued on as they wiped up Hops’ spill.

“Oh, uh… cola?” Odd choice, but Hops didn’t hesitate.

And the final mixer was… “Hot sauce!!!” With a mischievous smile, it looked like this bun was eager to add this particular ingredient to the pile.
“Ooooh, oh boy oh boy…” Hops—with wide eyes—picked up the bottle of hot sauce and started dribbling it into the tall glass as Angora watched on with a twinkle in her eye… almost as if that choice amused her.

Whoever could be the “lucky” bunny that had the honor of drinking this concoction, though? With a pull of the ace of clubs, its… Levi! As eyes turned to him he could feel himself shrink, but Hops bobbed on over with the mixed concoction and a smile to boot.
“No worries, fella! You got this! Tell us how it tastes afterward!”
“Uh… yeah, can do.” Honestly the drink didn’t look intimidating at all… minus the hot sauce. Guh, the hot sauce… but it’s best to go with the flow, right?! He let that shot sink with a plop, then took the whole glass down in five seconds. Gooh. Whooooh. It… actually wasn’t that bad, all things considered.

“So?” Hops looked at Levi expectantly; as his eyes drifted around the table, he caught Angora looking at him like one looks at a tasty morsel. There’s a right answer here, isn’t there?
“Well… pretty good.” The upturn of Angora’s lips and the unabashed smile on Hops’ face let him know that his answer was indeed correct.
“WOW?! It’s good??? Maybe I should actually write that one down…”
“Now now Hops,” Angora had stopped the bun as she’d been reaching for her cleavage notepad, “I think we ought to play a couple more rounds before we start concocting any winning recipes. Maybe we should get a little spicier, huh?”
“Oh… oh, yes ma’am, of course!”

And after a couple more rounds—Hops had been on the receiving end of an absinthe/ orange juice/ margarita mix shot with a blue curacao/ tomato juice/ ginger ale tall, while Angora herself had downed a maraschino liqueur/ milk/ grenadine shot with a midori/ coffee/ root beer tall—Levi had decided that it’d be a good time to get to a place where his friend could get him and excused himself from the table gently.
“Thanks for playin’ a couple rounds with us, hon. Don’t be a stranger!” Angora waved a poised little wave.
“Yeah! Your patronage is always welcome at the Wonderland Casino and Rabbit Hole!” Hops concluded in that perfect customer-service tone.

Oooh, were the weird drinks he had doing something to him? Levi shrugged as he walked off — perhaps it was about time for something a little more normal to drink…

…

Somewhere, sometime, somehow… Levi managed to get back to the Rabbit Hole, right where he started. And hey, the seat he was using earlier at the bar was still open too; great! After reclaiming his seat, Levi flagged down the barhand and asked for a mojito — a nice, refreshing minty drink to wash out all the weird flavors in his mouth. Yeah, that sounded good right about now.

“Mmm… moe… moe-he-toe…” Levi heard mumbling coming from his right side and he quickly turned his head… wait, when’d this guy get here?! Levi didn’t notice Shibani’s slumbering figure as he approached… Well, probably because Shibani had been half asleep, fell out of his chair, and had been resting with his face scrunched against the foot rest until Levi’s moving around woke him up. And yes, Levi did indeed watch Shibani slowly pick himself up off the ground, crawl into the bar chair, wipe away drool from the corner of his mouth, and instantly plop his head back onto the bar.

“You… Do you want one?” Levi tapped Shibani’s shoulder, causing him to roll over to face Levi. Oh yeah, Shibani was sloshed.
“Yeaaaaaa… mmmmminty fresh… like toothpaste.” Shibani’s smile was sorta lopsided, as half of his face was currently pressed into the table. Oh boy. With a sigh, Levi got the bartend’s attention again.
“Hey uh, can this guy get a virgin mojito? Or a drink that’ll help… uh, this situation.”
“Whaaa? Oh c’mon, I can take it! I love… toes! Minty toes! Dan’s toes… oooh…” Shibani’s eyes rolled to the side, as if he were thinking really hard about something. Toes? Levi didn’t wanna know.
“Er… um… well, I don’t doubt you can take it, but…”
“But?” Shibani turned back to Levi with big, pleading eyes. Oh no… his begging eyes were too powerful…
“But… well…”

“HEY! HEY STOP RIGHT THERE!”

The moment the bartender sat the drinks down in front of Levi and Shibani, a mountain suddenly materialized between the two. Ah, scratch that — it was Dan. Under one arm he had a giant bundle of… what seemed like paper, and under the other he now had Shibani.
“Oh nyooo, I’ve been caught!” Shibani wiggled around like a worm… but still reached down for his mojito. With a huff, Dan lifted Shibani up and away from the drink, turning to face Levi.

“What were you trying to do to Shibani? Getting him a drink while he’s this drunk — I know you’re up to no good…” Dan looked as if he wanted to point at Levi’s face, but his hands were… kinda full.
“Uh-uh-uh, well—”
“Seriously, you may be trying to do something funny, but at least you had the decency to buy him a drink. No, wait, did you mess with it? I take one eye off Shibani for one second—”
“It’s non-alcoholic!” Levi blurted out; he had to actively fight to get his word in.
“I — hah?” Depositing Shibani back into the chair—Shibani decided to make an endearing squeak as this happened—Dan picked up the glass that’d been placed in front of Shibani and gave it a sniff… then a sip. “Oh. Yeah. Non-alcoholic… uh, sorry.” He mumbled as he placed the glass back into Shibani’s hands and awkwardly toddled around to take the seat on Shibani’s other side.
“No problem. It may be better to just get him some water, though…”
“Yeah.”

This time it was Dan’s turn to flag the bartender down; an extra glass of water for Shibani after he finished drooling over his non-alcoholic mojito, and a glass of straight vodka for himself… bottom shelf. He looked across Shibani to Levi, almost sensing Levi’s questioning gaze. Bottom shelf vodka, tonight of all nights?

“Yeah yeah, I know… but—”
“Mister Dan! It’s still going… here you are, like you requested.” A casino attendant strolled up to Dan’s empty side, depositing a receipt machine onto the counter beside him… as well as another armful of paper into the nearby seat. One could call this particular machine a man-made paper waterfall with how many receipts were pouring out of it… and that’s when Levi realized that both the pile of paper that Dan had been carrying and the pile the attendant dropped seemingly at Dan’s feet were ALL RECEIPTS CONNECTED TO THIS ONE MACHINE.

“Tonight’s tab.” Dan said simply, catching Levi’s slack-jawed expression. “Ya didn’t think the food would be completely free, right? Someone’s gotta pay for it… someone being… me. I mean, Angora’s helping out, but only if I can get this all documented by the end of the night, she said…” And who was he to turn down that challenge? From the giant pile of receipts, Dan pulled a ledger and sat it down on the table just as soon as the bartender returned with that water and vodka. After all but slamming the vodka back, he carefully exchanged a sleepy Shibani’s empty glass out with the water.

“Ouch… uh, good luck?” That’s all that came to Levi in that current moment; Dan just sighed and nodded his head.
“By the great demons I swear, this has been nothing but a disaster…”
At that particular moment, Shibani—in his sleepy wisdom—just so happened to overhear Dan and mumble, “No d’saster… only… this ass… ter.” causing Dan’s tail to twitch and freeze at several different angles.
“Do it for him, do it for him…” Dan started mumbling, almost like a mantra as he started furiously scribbling down content in the ledger.

Best to leave these two to their own devices… Once more, Levi slid his empty mojito glass across the bar, got up out of his seat, and began to wander the venue once more.

…

“Levi! Levi! Heeeeeeey! I finally found you! Let me tell you, I had a great time with that other person…”
“Oh, hey. Looking a lot less drunk now.”
“I’ll say… and aren’t you looking a lot MORE drunk? Dude, what happened to you out there?”
“Man. Man it was wild. Like, I ate at least three different types of cheese. I won cards! Had like… many different drinks. Mojito…”
“Yo, maybe we should take you home… looks like your night was crazy.”
“Yeah… yeah… enough party, I wanna go home…”